Excerpt
“What,” Chelsey exclaims, “the hell is that?”
With a wide smile spreading across my face, I shove my hands in my pockets like a teenage boy and look at her. “A Christmas tree.”
“Are those . . . penises?”
“Technically, dildos.”
“Like real ones?” She jerks her alarmed gaze to me.
“No. Just plastic.”
She flicks her tongue across her lips. “Uh-huh. Why do you have penises across your Christmas tree?”
“Because he’s an immature little bastard,” Leila answers for me.
“You didn’t stop me,” I shoot back.
“Hell no I didn’t. I cannot wait to see Mom’s face when she sees this!”
“When she sees what?” Mom’s voice creeps through the house ominously, and the close of the door after her sounds like the signal that I should run away.
“Uh . . . I’m just gonna go . . .to the store. . . .” I shuffle toward the door that connects the front room with the kitchen.
Chelsey lifts her eyebrows in amusement, and Dad grabs the back of my shirt so I can’t escape.
You wouldn’t think I was twenty-four. For numerous reasons, obviously.
“Kye Burke, why are there tiny penises on my Christmas tree?”
Her voice is calm. Really calm. I’m even more convinced that I should run. “Merry Cock-mas?”
Mom’s expression is somewhere between insane amusement and extreme frustration.
“I’m just gonna come back later . . .” Chelsey whispers, edging toward the living room door. “When there are less . . . cocks.”
“Good idea! I’ll come with you.” I wrestle out of Dad’s grip and dart behind him, through the kitchen, and into the hall.
Chelsey laughs and grabs my arm, dragging me back into the room. “I said I was going. I didn’t say you were escaping this cock-up.”
“Great choice of words,” Dad chuckles.
Mom pinches the bridge of her nose. “I should have known that when three boys left, one boy would have to make the impression of three,” she says, mostly to herself. “I should have known that the one who never left his little peep alone at two would one day decorate my tree in cocks.”
“Mom! What the hell?” I sputter.
“I should have known that his ball-hoarding obsession at six was a sign of things to come,” she sighs heavily and drops her hand. “After all, there’s one in every boyband. I thought I was ready for this.” Then, she turns to me. “Kye, son, we love you anyway, but I have to ask. Are you gay?”
Chelsey lets go of me, and laughter rips from her. Leila laughs, too, her book falling to the floor. Dad covers his face with his hands, and Mom just stands there in the middle of the room, her eyes wide. Her hands are now clasped in front of her sympathetically, and the tiny upturn of the right side of her mouth explains it all.
“Well played, Mother,” I say reluctantly, walking back toward the front door. “Well. Played.”
She covers my hand with hers, the calculating spark
fading from her eyes. They’re back to normal now, warm, with the ghost of
laughter in their depths. “You’re right.”
“Of course I’m right. Burkes are never wrong.”
Her eyebrow quirks up, taking one side of her mouth up
with it. “Ya think?”
“I know.” I wink and drop my hand. “Like I know it would be an absolutely great idea to kiss you right
now.”
“Like it was a great idea to sleep in my bed and poke me
with your hard-on every ten minutes last night?”
I grin, seeing she isn’t going to respond to me directly,
and grasp her hips. I tug her away from the counter and back until I’m leaning
against the island and she’s pressed against me. Chelsey’s eyebrow lifts to
join the other, but she slides her hands up my chest until they link behind my
neck anyway.
I wipe the sass off her face with one simple touch of my
lips to hers. She melts into me, tasting like fresh coffee and mint toothpaste.
It’s an odd combination, but strangely intoxicating.
“Hey now—the sleeping was a great idea,” I murmur against
her mouth. “And if you don’t want to be poked by Joey in the middle of the
night, you should sort him out, woman.” I tap her ass, and she gasps, dropping
her hands.
“You seriously named your cock ‘Joey’?”
“Standard practice, babe. We all name our cocks. I bet
you’ve
named your tits.”
She looks down at them as if the idea is absurd, but her pause
gives her away. “Yeah, I guess I kinda did. You want an introduction?”
I laugh, pulling her back to me. “I believe we’ve met,
but we’re not on first-name terms.”
“Well. Kye Burke, this is Betty,” she says, cupping the
right one. “And this is Boop.” She cups the left one. “Girls, this is Kye.”
“It’s my pleasure,” I mutter, fighting my laughter. She’s
doing the same thing. I grab her hand and put it on my semihard cock.
“Chelsey, this is Joey. Joey, this is Chelsey.”
“We’ve met,” she laughs, licking her lips.
“Joey’s pretty fond of Betty and Boop,” I mutter,
hardening in her hand.
“Feels like Joey’s pretty fond of their owner, too.”
“You wanna find out just how much?”
She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth, looking up at me
in a sultry way through her lashes. Gently, she squeezes my now very fucking
hard cock and steps back. “Maybe later. I’m
hungry.”
She dances across the kitchen before I can do a thing,
and man am I fucking glad I put sweatpants on, because this erection is real
uncomfortable, even without the pressure of jeans.
“You’re gonna pay for that later.”
She glances over her shoulder playfully. “We’ll see.”
